Fear of intimacy in dating

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In subsequent days, we emailed back and forth, then switched to phone calls as our conversation deepened.

A week after first making contact, Bob and I met for dinner at a restaurant.

Widowed and divorced women who hear this story often tell me I was “lucky” — an odd thing to say, given the circumstance: At 54, after a happy 24-year marriage, I was widowed.

They may have suffered through a troubled childhood experience that has wounded them or they now have higher priorities such as their career or taking care of a sick parent.

A water engineer named Bob, he had two grown kids and, like me, was recently widowed.

Though his picture was unappealingly stiff and his mention (twice) of wanting to find a “soul mate” made me wince (twice), several lines in his profile caught my attention.

Bonding with your partner is a critical part of a loving, lasting relationship.

It’s also one of the best parts of loving another person — sharing a close bond makes us feel safe, secure, and wanted.

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